I’ve lost the desire to see people, and there is nothing wrong with that.

Short post. I’m just not sure if I want to see people anymore. It’s better that way for everyone. However, I can connect through the internet, and maybe I can figure out a way to be useful that way, even with my special interest. I can randomly text some people if I need some mental stimulation, but I’m getting plenty through Twitter, of all places. I’m trying to post a picture a week, approximately, on Instagram to let people I’m alive, so they stop worrying about me. Furthermore, I’ve reverted to not caring what they are doing. I would rather not be a part of the “normal” world anymore. It was always too difficult. I can get on and off in about two minutes, and it’s almost a chore to do it. That’s good. I’ve always hated social media, but I hope this will stop people from wondering how I am. “I’m fine. Just leave me alone. Please.” That’s what I want them to know. It will probably backfire. We’ll see. I was encouraged to do this, to post some of my work, and maybe I’ll finish my social media post sometime.

I’m lucky my wife is willing to provide for me, and I don’t feel guilty about it since I’ve been in that role for many years as well. Not everyone is that fortunate.
So, I can see my wife and my children when I’m not too annoying. I may see family some, and there will be enough medical appointments to insure I do go somewhere a few times a month.

Maybe, I’ll get inspired to visit some older acquaintances; they tend to be safe. I do have to see a few people at my very part-time job, but I’m managing to sneak in and out as quickly as possible, limiting my contact to one person for an hour. And, he seems rather autistic, and he’s interested in something I know a lot about, so that’s cool.

But, for the most part, I’m going to avoid people, and I don’t know if there is anything wrong with that.

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One response to “I’ve lost the desire to see people, and there is nothing wrong with that.”

  1. […] I was never going to be a perfect friend, but I was always going to be a special one. And, potentially, that’s more than most people want. Considering how much I’m now afraid to be around people, even my wife and children at times, I’m thinking there is something very wrong with me, that I just can’t overcome my “specialness.” It is not my intention to upset people, and the easiest way to do that is to avoid them. Honestly, as I discuss in another post, I’ve lost the desire to see other people, and there is nothing wrong with that. […]


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